Goal Setting/Time Management

GOAL SETTING/TIME MANAGEMENT

Unit Objectives:

1. To understand the importance of having goals.

2. To distinguish three basic life patterns: productive, nonproductive, and destructive.

3. To describe how personal choices, goal setting, and life patterns are related.

4. To understand the relationship between productive life patterns and effective goal setting.

5. To examine and prioritize activities to make the best use of their time.

Unit Lessons:

1. Lesson 1 Types of Life Paths

2. Lesson 2 Goal Setting: Values

3. Lesson 3 Goal Setting: Long -Term, Short-Term

4. Lesson 4 Time and Priorities

LESSON 1 Types of Life Paths

Background: This lesson is based on the premise that students can lead happier, healthier, and more productive lives by learning how to set and achieve goals. The lesson helps the students learn a variety of skills that can enhance their ability to plan ahead and lay the groundwork for personal growth and success.

Materials and Equipment:

1. "My Life Pattern" worksheet(alternate or additional activity)

Activities

1. Present a mini lecture on life patterns and the choices people make about how they will conduct their lives. (10 minutes)

2. Divide the class into groups of four or five. Each group develops a story "chain' describing a productive, nonproductive, or destructive life pattern. (15 minutes)

3. Share the results in a conversation circle. (5 minutes)

ACTIVITY 1

Today's activity encourages the students to think about how our decisions affect our lives and how our life patterns can be guided by our goals. A person can choose whether to lead a productive, nonproductive, or destructive life. This session helps the students see that they can exercise control over their futures by making productive decisions and setting positive goals.

Before class begins, write the session purpose on the chalkboard.

Step 1:

You may wish to begin the session by writing the following quotation on the chalkboard and taking a minute or so to ask the students what they think it means.

"If you don't know where you're going, you'll end up somewhere else.

Step 2:

Tell the students, "Everyone is born with the ability to achieve. Every person has the potential to be successful, happy, and productive. Yet early in childhood many people experience failure, rejection, and other things that hurt their self-confidence and their chances for success. Sometimes they learn unproductive ways of solving problems, or they develop a tendency to blame others instead of accepting responsibility for their behavior. As children get older, they may develop their potential or experience failure and disappointment. Often it's a combination of the two-sometimes they succeed, sometimes they don't. The older they grow and the more independent they become, the more decisions they make that can affect their future chances of success. People's choices and decisions can lead them into one of three basic life patterns. Some people are basically 'productive,' some 'nonproductive,' and some downright 'destructive."' Describe the three basic life patterns in some detail, as follows.

A productive life pattern is healthy, purposeful, and positive. People who follow this pattern generally know how to make wise decisions and choices, how to overcome obstacles, and how to get to where they want to go in life. When they make an unwise choice or decision, they know how to admit it, make a change, and go on. If they think they need to learn new skills in order to get what they want, they're willing to do some hard work, risk failure, and start again in order to get there.

A nonproductive life pattern is like a leaf floating in a lake. People who follow this pattern drift wherever the breeze blows them. They tend to be purposeless. They hardly realize that they have choices to make about their lives and that it's within their power to take control.

A destructive life pattern can be as purposeful as a productive one, but the purpose is usually negative. Destructive people lash out at and blame their families, their teachers, the world. Mostly, they're so caught up in their negative feelings about themselves and others that they find it difficult to concentrate on anything positive or creative. They refuse to accept any responsibility for what's happening in their lives.

Offer a specific example of the three types of life patterns, and ask the students to suggest specific examples of people they know, without identifying anyone by name. The examples may be people in books they've read or TV shows and movies they've seen.

Ask the students the following questions for each type of example:

What do you think it feels like to be this kind of person?

What do you think this person's effect is on other people?

Step 3:

List the three types of life patterns on the chalkboard and have the students suggest reasons why people fall into these different patterns. Ask the class, "Why do you think someone would choose to be productive? What are the rewards? Why do you think someone would choose to be nonproductive? What's in it for that person? Why do you think someone would choose destructive behavior?" Be sure to explain that most of us have a little of each pattern in our lives. It is the pattern that we demonstrate most of the time that becomes our main life pattern.

ACTIVITY 2

Step 1:

Divide the class into six groups (or if the class consists of fewer than 18 students, three groups). Make sure the groups balance students with a variety of skills and skill levels. Explain that each group will create a short story "chain" illustrating a person's life pattern.

To create a story chain, one of the group members starts by saying how the story begins. Then the group members go around their small circle adding details and plot developments until they're satisfied that they've told a complete story. One member of each group acts as the recorder, and another is the reporter. The recorder takes notes on the plot details; the reporter will tell the story to the large group.

Step 2:

Have two of the groups (or one if the class is small) develop a story about a person who has succeeded and feels good about himself/herself-one who has chosen a productive life pattern. Have two of the groups (or one if the class is small) create stories about people who have chosen nonproductive life patterns-people who drift along, never trying anything new. Have the remaining group(s) develop stories about people who have chosen destructive life patterns. Encourage the students to be creative with this, but be prepared to offer prompts and suggestions if you realize that they're finding it difficult. You may wish to create a brief story yourself as an example.

Allow about ten minutes for completion of the task.

ACTIVITY 3

Step 1:

Bring the students together in a conversation circle to share their stories. Compare the different life stories and determine what some of the most important decisions in these people's lives were.

ASK THE FOLLOWING QUESTIONS :

1. What things in the person's life did he/she have no control over?

2. What things in the person's life could he/she have changed?

3. How would these changes have made a difference in the person's life pattern?

4. What do you think this activity has to do with setting goals?

LESSON 2 GOAL SETTING: VALUES

Background: We work toward the goals that we think are important. Part of the goal setting process is determining what is important and why. It is in this formulation of goals that our values play an important role. We are willing to put time, effort and money into the areas that we feel are important to us. These areas can change over time as our values change. The pre-teen and teen years are certainly times of transition when different sets of values are experimented with. These changing values can be a significant factor in the goals that we keep and the ones we discard or reevaluate.

Materials and Equipment:

1. One auction list handout per person

2. One pencil per person

ACTIVITY

Step 1:

Give each participant an auction list handout. Explain to them that they have $2000 to bid on the items from the list. The items will be auctioned off one at a time. All bids must be in increments of $100. The item will go to the highest bidder. Run it just like a regular auction. Give the individuals time before the auction begins to look down their list and see which items they wish to bid on and how much they think they might offer. This amount should be written in the column marked "Proposed Bid." They are not held to that amount, but it gets them thinking about the items and their worth to them. During the auction have everyone keep track of how much the item was actually sold for and who the winning bidder was. After you have auctioned off all of the items, there will be some students with money left.

Tell the students before you begin that anyone who has $500 or more left at the end of the auction can spend their entire remaining amount on one of three secret boxes after the auction is complete. These three boxes can be sold to as many people as have the money and wish to buy them. This part is not a bidding process. Do not tell them what is contained in each of the three boxes. The three boxes contain the following: Box number one-You bought a lottery ticket and won a million dollars; Box number two- You dropped out of high school and took a job at below minimum wage with no chance of advancement; Box number three- You graduated from high school, went to college and took a job that pays a reasonable salary, but you dislike what you do.

This activity is played to show where our values and goals lie. What you were willing to spend your money on gives you an idea of what you think is important. Those with money left over at the end have no real strong goals as of yet, or at least none that were on the list. The secret boxes at the end of the auction are used to show that if you don't know where you are headed, then you will just end up with whatever life hands you. The reason you had money at the end of the auction could be because you didn't feel strong enough about anything on the list to bid all you had. Goal setting helps give direction to your life. As you mature and find your values or lifestyle changing, your goals can be adjusted accordingly.

DISCUSSION IDEAS:

¥ What items sold for the highest amounts?

¥ What items sold for the lowest amounts?

¥ In what category would you put the higher selling items?

¥ In what category would you put the lower selling items?

¥ Why did some items sell for more than others?

¥ Why were some people willing to bid a higher amount for some items than they were willing to bid on other items?

¥ What does this tell us about the value people place on different things in life?

¥ Why didn't everyone want the same items?

¥ Were there any items you really wanted to bid on, but were afraid of what the other people in the group would think or say about you?

¥ Were any items not bid upon? or had a very low bid? Why?

¥ What does the overall bidding tell us about our group?

¥ Does this type of activity give us any indication about what we feel is of value to us in life?

¥ How did you feel when all of your money was gone?

¥ How did you feel if you had money left at the end of the auction?

¥ Did any of you consciously save money to be able to purchase a secret box? Why or why not?

¥ How did those people who bid on the secret boxes feel about their purchase?

¥ How can we apply this activity to real life?

¥ What are some of the things that you would be willing to really work for to accomplish?

AUCTION LIST

Each person has a total of $2,000 to bid with.

Item to be auctioned Proposed Bid Actual Bid Purchaser

1. To be a famous rock star

2. To never be sick

3. To be extremely smart

4. To be a famous sports star

5. To be beautiful

6. To be President of the USA

7. To have a great looking body

8. To be a famous model

9. To be a school teacher

10. To graduate from a famous college

11. To never have pimples

12. To help underprivileged children

13. To be a doctor

14. To be a successful politician

15. To raise happy children

16. To be a successful artist

17. To live a long life

18. To own whatever car I would like

19. To marry a good looking person

20. To have a successful business

21. To live in a mansion

22. To be liked by everyone

23. To be a famous movie star

24. To help the homeless problem

25. To have a lot of close friends

26. To be happy in life

27. To be a millionaire

28. To help others

29. To travel around the world

30. To have a great relationship with my parents

Use the bottom of the page to record how much money you have spent so far on successful bids. Remember to stop bidding when you have spent $2,000. If you have $500 or more left at the end of the auction, you can purchase one of the secret boxes. Each secret box has an undisclosed future in it. Each of the three boxes may be purchased by as many people as have the money left to do so.

LESSON 3 Goal Setting

Background:

1. To stress the importance of goals in achieving school success

2. To introduce the idea of long-, middle-, and short-term goals

3. To give students the opportunity to think through their own long-, middle-, and short-term goals

Materials and Equipment:

1. Red pens or pencils

2. Sample Goal-setting Worksheet

3. Goal-setting Worksheet

4. Chalkboard or chart paper

Activities:

1. Discuss Goal Setting 10 minutes

2. Student Work Time 15 minutes

3. Closing Time 5 minutes

ACTIVITY 1 Discuss Goal Setting

Step 1:

Invite students to share what they learned about themselves since the last session.

Ask the following questions.

Is there any time you could be studying when you aren't? When do you seem to be wasting the most time?

What would you be willing to change about the way you schedule your time to become a better student?

Do you study better in the morning, afternoon, or evening?

What days of the week is it easiest for you to schedule study time?

Step 2:

Distribute the red pens or pencils and instruct students to write down those time periods they are willing to devote to improving themselves as students. This might mean getting tutoring, spending time in the library, getting help from a teacher or friend, and so forth.

Step 3:

Ask students for a verbal commitment to try to put their changes into effect. What do they think might happen if they do this?

ACTIVITY 2 Student Working Time

Step 1:

Briefly describe the goals of the session.

Step 2:

Ask students to imagine that their family is going on a trip to France for summer vacation. Discuss some of the decisions or steps that would be involved before the family could get to France.

How would they travel (train, plane,car, or boat)?

What route should they take?

What factors should they consider in deciding when to go?

What should they take into account in deciding how much money to bring?

What kind of clothes would be best?

Step 3:

Point out that getting to France is the goal, and the decisions the family must make to reach this goal are the plan. Explain that in order to be a better student you also need a plan, or you might never reach your goals. Your plan is your "map" for reaching your goals.

Step 4:

Discuss the following questions.

What is a goal?

What do you think having goals would do for you? Would you rather have goals or not have them?

What types of goals do you think there are?

Step 5:

Elicit that goals can be thought of in terms of the time it takes to reach them. In other words, they are long term (accomplished in years), middle term (accomplished in weeks or months), or short term (accomplished in weeks, days, or hours). Generate examples of each type. For example:

Long-term goals

To go to college or get into the military

To become an astronaut

To graduate from high school

To get a good score on the SAT

Middle-term goals

To pass algebra

To take driver's education

To pass band class then get into the marching band

To finish a science project on time

Short-term goals

To come to group and not be too scared

To ask the gym teacher to let us play volleyball today

To pass a social studies test this afternoon

To make it through math without getting kicked out

Step 6: Distribute copies of the Goal-setting Worksheet and invite the group to identify a possible long term, middle-term, and short-term goal for becoming a better student. Write down these goals on the chalkboard or chart paper, then brainstorm the steps needed to reach them. (Use the Sample Goal-setting Worksheet as a model.)

ACTIVITY 3 Closing Time

Step 1:

Invite students to think of one long-, middle-, and short-term goal that would help them become better students. Ask them whether they would be willing to write these goals and the steps needed to reach them on their Goal-setting Worksheets. Let them know they will have the opportunity to share their ideas at the next session.

Step 2:

Discuss the following questions.

What did you learn in group today?

How could this help you be happier?

Are you willing to work on developing your goals?

After you have your goals outlined, what do you think it will take to get you started? What is keeping you from getting started?

What will it take for you to be successful in reaching goals?

What do you need to reach your goals that you don't have now?

Step 3:

Ask whether there is anything anyone would like to say before the group ends. Remind students of the confidentiality rule and the time for the next meeting.

y S. Date 916190

Sample Goal-setting Worksheet

Instructions: Write down one long-term goal, one middle-term goal, and one short-term goal. Then write down the steps you think you will need to take to reach these goals.

Long-term Goal To make the honor roll by the end of the year

Steps

1 Set aside an hour and a half each night to study.

2.Go to study and test-taking lab to improve skills.

3.Complete every assignment carefully and on time.

4.Get help soon in areas where I'm having problems.

5.Volunteer, select, and begin extra credit projects early.

Middle-term Goal To get at least a B on my science project

Steps

1. Read several sources about Saturn and its rings.

2. Make an outline of the written report.

3. Construct the planet and a stand to support it.

4. Have Mom proofread report, finish Saturn's rings.

5. Assemble project, take to school a day before it is due.

Short-term Goal To pass my math test next Friday

Steps

1. Get homework written down clearly.

2. Complete and turn in homework all week.

3. Ask Mr. Johnson for extra help on Problems I don't understand.

4. Study during extra homework period.

5. Study extra for the test and do my best!

Goal-setting Worksheet

Instructions: Write down one long-term goal,one middle-term goal and one short-term goal. Then write down the steps you think you will need to take to reach these goals.

Long-term Goal

Steps

1.____________________________________________________________________________

2.____________________________________________________________________________

3.____________________________________________________________________________

4.____________________________________________________________________________

5.____________________________________________________________________________

Middle-term Goal

Steps

1.____________________________________________________________________________

2.____________________________________________________________________________

3.____________________________________________________________________________

4.____________________________________________________________________________

5.____________________________________________________________________________

Short-term Goal

Steps

1.____________________________________________________________________________

2.____________________________________________________________________________

3.____________________________________________________________________________

4.____________________________________________________________________________

5.____________________________________________________________________________

LESSON 4 Time and Priorities

Background: Students become more aware of the dominant American culture's

preoccupation with time.

They consider how this preoccupation affects them personally.

They examine how they use their time outside of school.

They assess their own ability to prioritize activities and use their time

wisely.

Materials and Equipment:

1. Chalkboard or overhead projector

2. Student worksheet "My Life Outside of School"

Activities:

1. Brainstorm Session 10 minutes

2. Student Discussion 10 minutes

3. Worksheet 10 minutes

ACTIVITY 1 Brainstorm Session

Step 1: Start the session by asking the students to brainstorm all the

compound words or phrases they can think of that include the word

"time." Some examples follow.

saving time taking time

making time arranging a time

losing time gaining time

overtime time clock

time sheet time-and-a-half

flex-time part-time

full-time leisure time

in time on time

a reasonable time in good time

high time against time

time-share timer

timekeeper time-tested

standard time daylight savings time

timetable time to go

time out time off

time's up out of time

Step 2: Offer the observation that language reflects what a culture

emphasizes. Other cultures may not have so many words about

"time"-or so many clocks.

ACTIVITY 2 Student Discussion

Step 1: Begin a discussion about time and how it affects our lives. Encourage the students to give specific examples of time constraints on their lives. What "price" do they pay? After they have shared, ask questions like the following.

How does our preoccupation with time affect our ability to relax and enjoy life? Are you able to relax when you need to?

Are we so caught up in instant gratification and quick fixes that we neglect or have trouble with things that take time? What about long-term relationships? Long-term projects? Reading long books or watching long movies? Learning new things that can't be learned overnight, such as a language? Are you involved in anything long-term?

Have we accepted the idea that "more and faster" always equals "better"? Where might we see this in our society?

Are we prisoners of time? Do our stress, fatigue, and frustration reflect that? Do we overextend ourselves? Do you feel overextended"?

Step 2: Invite the students to consider how their attitudes about time affect them personally. Ask, "What changes would you like to make in the way you perceive and use time? What would make you feel more satisfied with your life?" Encourage students to share their thoughts.

ACTIVITY 3 Worksheet

Step 1: Introduce the concept of prioritizing activities. Hand out the "My Life Outside of School" activity sheet (page 71). Ask the students to divide the first "pie" into segments representing the average time they spend each week working, sleeping, eating, studying, socializing with friends, relaxing, and interacting with family.

Step 2: Have the students present their pie charts and comment on whether they show "good prioritizing" or "poor prioritizing." Ask questions like the following.

According to your pie chart, are you a good time manager?

Are you spending enough (too much) time on your responsibilities? What about your needs? Your relationships?

Are you spending too much time on one thing and not enough time on something else of equal or greater importance?

What could you do to improve the way you spend your time?

How do you feel about your time distribution?

Step 3: If time permits, tell the students that they may use the other "pie" on the activity sheet to show how they would Like to spend their time. Discuss the differences between the first and second pie charts.

Step 4: For closure, ask the students for their "timely" opinions about this session. Was it "time well spent"?

Extra material for discussion.

Some young adults spend too much time doing what is urgent instead of what is important. Identify what is important to do and then assess how much time will be spent on what is important in one's life. Communication with significant others is most important in managing stress. Goals identify what is important and what needs to be done first. Priorities help define the future and lay out an action plan. it is important to reset goals, as well as have goals be realistic and not too easy. Self acceptance is the key to goal setting.

Words are powerful. "We are what we think." Therefore, when setting goals, it is important to erase the following words from one's vocabulary: Can't, Impossible, If only, But, However, Difficult, Ought to, Should, Always, Never, Must, Won't, and Could, plus words that lead to comparisons.

Realistic self-talk is an effective self management technique which can allow young adults to control their own thinking. Since thoughts influence our feelings and behavior, how one thinks can be managed. Below is a list of common types of negative young adult self-talk:

Awfulizing "Let me tell you how bad this is...

Negativising Look at the negative, down side of situations

Magnifying Making things worse than they really are; overeating

Catastrophising Turning things into worry and over-concern

Shoulding Excessive use of the word,"Should"

Self Doubting Showing a lack of confidence by not believing in self

Blaming A common defense mechanism to excuse self

Some examples of good one-liners for stress control:

I am calm and confident.

I enjoy the process of working.

I balance accomplishment with relaxation.

I am like stillness in the center of a storm.

I am doing the best I can.

One step at a time.

I can remain calm with this difficult person.

I know I am okay no matter what happens.

I have the capacity to do almost anything.

Is this truly worth getting upset about?

In the future does this really matter?

Don't sweat the small stuff -It's all small stuff

When time is wasted, life is wasted. In order to work smarter, not harder, try prioritizing or better time management. Make a list of all the things that have to be done, and then use the ABC Method to work smarter. List things as A if they are important and urgent; B if they are important but not urgent or, urgent but not important; and C if they are busy work marginally worth doing.

Poor time management may be a problem if one is always rushing, feeling tired, indecisive and missing timelines. For each minute spent planning each day, five minutes a day is saved; i.e., five minutes to plan, twenty-five minutes saved. Unfortunately, most people spend 80% of their time doing their C priorities and only 20% of their time doing their As. Improving time management can save two hours in an eight hour day, which allows more time for rest, to be with friends, and of course, to do homework.

Sleep is also affected by poor time management. Medical studies show that young adults need 9 to 10 hours of sleep per night. One may think that sleep is a waste of time, and he/she could even believe one really enjoys staying up late. The bad news is, even though an average of 110 days a year may be spent in bed, without adequate sleep, one can become sleep-deprived. Young adults who are sleep deprived often spend ten to fifteen hours a night sleeping on weekends (a catching up effect). Fifteen hours means going to bed at ten at night and waking up at one the next afternoon.

Insomnia can also be related to stress. Some of the common causes of young adult insomnia are overwork, fatigue, drug use, depression, asthma/allergies, late video gaming and TV watching, and drinking caffeine/ soda and eating sugar. Besides going to bed earlier, some other ways to avoid waking.up tired are: not drinking or using other drugs, increasing exercise level, going to bed more tired, and avoiding using bedtime for problem solving. Be patient-it takes the average person fifteen minutes to fall asleep.

Stress management is also a decision making and problem solving process. An Alter-Avoid-Accept Approach (Tubersing) can be used to better cope with stress. Alter means remove the source of stress by changing something. Avoid refers to withdrawing from the stressful situation-get out! Accept has to do with being ready physically and mentally to handle whatever needs to be done.

Sometimes the best way to handle stress is to say no, remembering one can always change one's mind. Conflict is a normal part of healthy relationships, it is good to agree or disagree. As a young adult, do not make the mistake of saying yes when meaning no. Young adult wellness has a lot to do with telling people how one really feels and expressing opinions, even when they are much different than everyone else's. When a young adult is assertive, he/she not only expresses feelings and says no without feeling guilty, they also are able to tell people what is needed. Young adults practicing wellness know what they need and they go after it.

With effective decision making comes knowledge about how to solve problems. Look at every problem as an opportunity to change. Instead of focusing on the problem, focus on the solution. The three steps to problem solving are as follows: 1. Admit the problem by saying, "My problem is...."; 2. List the alternatives by writing down choices; 3. Develop an action plan by committing to doing what needs to be done.

My Life Outside of School

Divide this "pie" into pieces showing how much time you spend each week working, sleeping, eating, studying, socializing with friends, relaxing, and interacting with family.

Divide this "pie" into pieces showing how you would like to spend your time.

(OCTOBER)

STUDENT ACHIEVEMENT

Name Grade

Homeroom Teacher Date____________

A. ACADEMIC GOAL

The subject I want to work on is

I want to work on this subject because_____________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________________

My last report card grade in this subject was a/an

The goal I want to work on is______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

This is how I believe I can reach this goal:

Step 1._________________________________________________________________

2._________________________________________________________________

3._________________________________________________________________

B. BEHAVIOR GOAL

The behavior goal I want to work on is__________________________________________________________________

The reason I want to work on this goal is______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

This is how I believe I can reach this goal:

Step 1._________________________________________________________________

2._________________________________________________________________

3._________________________________________________________________

C. ORGANIZATION GOAL

The organizational goal I want to work on is

__________________________________________________________________

The reason I want to work on this goal is

__________________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________________

This is how I believe I can reach this goal:

Step 1._________________________________________________________________

2._________________________________________________________________

3._________________________________________________________________

OBSTACLES I MIGHT ENCOUNTER

ACADEMIC________________________________________________________

____________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

SOLUTION______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

BEHAVIOR______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

ORGANIZATIONAL_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

SOLUTION____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

__________________________________________________________

(NOVEMBER)

RESPONSIBILITY

Unit Objectives:

1. To identify statements and actions which put responsibility on others.

2. To identify statements and actions which accept responsibility.

3. To practice taking responsibility for statements and actions.

4. To enable students to distinguish situations of external control and internal control.

5. To identify situations where "People in Authority" are in charge.

6. To show students that even though they may not control some situations, they do have some control over their mental approach to the situations.

Unit Lessons:

1. Lesson 1 Responsible Statements

2. Lesson 2 Assuming Responsibility

3. Lesson 3 Dealing with Persons in Authoritative Positions

LESSON 1 Responsible Statement

Background: This lesson asks the student to identify responsible and non-responsible statements. Responsible statements are statements that let the student assume the responsibility for their actions. They usually contain the word I. For example: I lost my homework. I made an A on my report. Non-responsibile statements put the blame on others or some "it" for the student's actions. These statements usually contain the words you, it, or someone's name. For example: You made me lose my homework. It blew away. John made me quit my job. Recognizing the difference between responsible and non-responsible statements is the first step students must take in assuming responsibility for themselves. The teacher should be supportive of all students' efforts since assuming responsibility for themselves will be very threatening for some students. Often, admitting a behavior such as not doing school work removes the student's excuses, leaving them with no defense for their inappropriate actions. Be aware of each student's level of self-responsibility and understand that acquiring self-responsibility is a slow process. Self-responsibility and skills in this area are addressed throughout the entire curriculum to promote the student's acquisition of self responsibility skills over a non-threatening period of time.

Materials and Equipment:

1. Student Activity Sheets

a.Teacher Demonstration: Responsible/Not Responsible Scenes (Answer Sheet)

b. Lesson Synopsis

c. Journal Page

2. Handouts

a. Discussion Guidelines (1 per student)

b. Student Role Plays

Activities:

1. Relaxation Exercises 5 minutes

2. Labeling Statements 10 minutes

3. Role Playing 10 minutes

4. Teacher Demonstration Responsible/Non-Responsible Scenes 10 minutes

5. Synopsis 5 minutes

6. Journal 5 minutes

ACTIVITY 1 Relaxation Exercises

Steps 1: Allow students to put their heads down and quietly relax for 5 minutes.

ACTIVITY 2 Labeling Statements

Step 1: Prior to this activity, the teacher should make two (3 in.-x 12 i-n.) signs on poster board. On one sign, write "Responsible" and on the other "Not Responsible". Also the teacher should write each of the responsible-and not responsible statements (listed below) on an index card or on strips of poster board.

Responsible Not Responsible

1. I will do it. She won't let me get my work done.

2. I choose to be mad. Sammy made me do it.

3. I left my work out where the dog could get it. The dog chewed up my homework.

4. I don't have it. Would you believe?

5. I choose to do what my friend wanted. It got lost.

6. I brought my pencil today. You make me mad.

7. I choose to take care of me. My job keeps me from doing my homework.

8. I choose to be happy It's not my fault that I'm tired

9. I will get a ride to the show You made me do that.

10. I will ask for help on my homework. He started it.

Place the two signs on one wall of room, one labeled: RESPONSIBLE and the other: NOT RESPONSIBLE. Tell the students: "Today we are going to discuss responsibility. Responsibility is admitting our actions; one way to admit or assume responsibility is to make responsible statements. Responsible statements are statements that let us own up to whatever we do or- say. They usually begin with I. For example: I was late today. You see, I am admitting I was late and I'm not blaming anyone for it. I am responsible for my being late. Not Responsible statements put the blame on others for what we say or do. Not Responsible statements usually start with You, It, or someone's name. For Example: You made me late. I am blaming "You" for my being late. I am responsible for my lateness so "you made me late" is a Not Responsible statement.

Note to teacher: Keep in mind that you can make a responsible statement about a not responsible action. For example, (statement #3) leaving your work out where the dog can destroy it is a not responsible behavior. Responsible students look after their materials and homework papers, keep them out of reach of dogs, siblings, etc., and bring them to class on time. However, the statement "I left my work out where the dog could get it." is a responsible statement because even though the student was not responsible by being careless with their work, they are accepting responsibility for not having their work, admits doing something careless, and has not blamed the dog or anyone else for ruining his homework.

As the students place their cards under the headings responsible and not responsible, point out this distinction between irresponsible actions and responsible statements about those actions. Responsible statements which revolve around irresponsible actions are #3 and #4.

Other examples might be:

"I stole the purse."

"I broke the window."

"I gambled away all the money."

Step 2: Give each student two statement cards, one with a responsible statement and one with a not responsible statement on it. Direct students (one at a time) to tape their statements under the appropriate sign.

Step 3: Pass out discussion guidelines. Remind students to use these guidelines during the discussion and that you will be giving cues to their discussion behavior. They are to put a tally mark for each participation whether you note it or not (try to verbally note all) and any interruptions or off-subject questions or comments.

Step 4: A. Discussion: RESPONSIBLE Statements

1. "How are these alike?" (Answers: They start with I, all are actions where you admit that you are responsible.)

2. "In the responsible statements, who is in control of the behavior." (Answers: I am, the person making the statements.)

3. "How do you feel when you are given responsibilities and you

complete them?" (Variable)

4. "Are these statements in the right column?" (If not, have students

change them. Ask why they want to change them.)

5. "Let's look at one particular statement which may at first seem to

be not responsible. "I don't have it."-Is a responsible statement. I am admitting that I didn't meet an obligation. I may not be acting responsible if I don't have an assignment, but I am being responsible by admitting that I don't have it. I am not blaming anyone else for my actions."

B. Discussion: NOT RESPONSIBLE Statements

1. "How are these alike?" (Answer: Put the blame on someone else.

Have words like You, it or someone or thing to start the sentence.)

2. "Sometimes, if you don't do something you were supposed to

do how do you feel?" (anxious, nervous, bad, etc.) "Do you try

to get out of it?" (variable) Then what happens? (variable)

3. "What might be a better way to handle it?" (Possible Answer: Do what you were supposed to do so you can feel good.)

Step 5: Stop and have students look at their discussion evaluation to see how they are doing. Ask: a) "What participation areas are you using most?" (Stroke students for efforts): b)"Think about what you would like to do to improve your discussion behavior."

ACTIVITY 3 Role Play

Step 1: Choose four students to role play the two scenes. Give each student their dialogue. Role plays with comments follow. After each scene, ask the students in the audience to decide which replies are responsible and which replies are not responsible. The purpose of the activity is to identify the responsible and not responsible statements, not to explore the issue of why homework is important. Keep within the time limits.

Step 2: Do the first scene. Ask the student audience to identify responsible and not responsible statements after the students read them.

ROLE PLAY I: HOMEWORK NOT DONE.

TEACHER: "Why don't you have your homework?"

Student 1: "I lost it on the Bus."

Student 2: "My baby brother threw up on it."

Student 3: "I forgot it."

Ask student audience to identify whether these replies are responsible or not.

1. "Who is being responsible?" (Student 1 and Student 3 are. Both students do not have their homework and both are admitting it.)

2. "Who is not being responsible?" (Student 2, is blaming his little brother. They could have redone their homework if they had done it. This person is not taking responsibility for not having their homework.)

Comments: Part of a homework assignment is to get it here on time. We all have choices. If you choose not to do something, think what the consequences (results) will be. But own up to your choice. You either have your homework or you don't. It's better to be honest than to make up an excuse that may not be true. Lying often gets you in more trouble than what you are lying about.

Have students do Role Play 2.

ROLE PLAY 2: TURNING IN HOMEWORK

TEACHER: "Get out your homework."

STUDENT 1: "Here it is."

STUDENT 2: "Someone at work spilled stuff on it."

STUDENT 3: "I don't have it."

1. "Who is being responsible?" (Student 1 and Student 3 are. Student 1 has their homework and is taking responsibility for having it. Student 3 doesn't have their homework but they are taking responsibility for not having it.)

2. "Who is not being responsible?" (Student 2 is not accepting responsibility for not having their homework. Student 2 probably feels bad, not only because they do not have their homework, but because they made up an untrue excuse. Student 3 probably feels bad about not having their homework, but they feel good about being responsible and telling the truth.)

3. "Which of the two statements (Student 2 or Student 3) would you feel better saying if you didn't have your homework? Why?" (Variable)

ACTIVITY 4 Teacher Demonstration

Step 1: Tell the students that you are going to act out three brief dialogues illustrating responsibility and not responsibility. As you read the situations you may want to hold up name cards for each character to help the students remember which role you are playing.

A. Handout worksheet titled TEACHER DEMONSTRATION: RESPONSIBLE. (A copy of the answer sheet with key is shown

below.)

1. Janet Ma

2. Anne Bill

3. Teacher Class

(Neither)

DIALOGUE I: TWO SISTERS

Mary: There is no way that I can pass my test in English tomorrow. It'll just be too hard. I think I'll stay in the den and watch TV.

Janet: Not me, I know the test will be hard, but if I spend tonight studying, I might pass it.

DIALOGUE 2

Bill: Mother and Dad had a big fight last night. I tried to ignore it. Did you hear it?

Anne: Yeah, and Mother and Dad make me feel terrible when they fight with each other.

DIALOGUE 3

Class: (All talking at the same time, giggling and teasing others.)

Teacher: (Yelling) You're driving me crazy.

B. Ask the students to listen carefully to the scene as you read it. Then direct the students to place a check by the person in each dialogue who is taking responsibility for his actions by using a responsible statement.

Step 3: Discussion:

A. "Who's being responsible in dialogue 1?" Janet is being responsible. Mary is blaming the test for her failure. (It's too hard.) Mary is choosing to fail by not studying, but she is blaming the test for failure. Janet admits the test will be hard, but she is choosing to succeed by studying.

B. Dialogue 2

Bill is responsible. Anne blamed her parents for her choice to not feel good unless Mom and Dad were also feeling good.

C. Dialogue 3

Neither was being responsible. The class was not being responsible for their actions in class and the teacher blamed the students when they said "you're driving me crazy." The teacher chooses to lose control. If time permits, you may want to discuss what student and teacher responsibilities are in the classroom.

Step 4: Have students also silently evaluate (just review) their performance in discussion.

A. "What participation areas are you using most?"

B. "Think about what you would like to do to improve your discussion

behavior."

ACTIVITY 5 Synopsis

Step 1: Handout worksheet titled TAKING RESPONSIBILITY (SYNOPSIS). Read the synopsis aloud and have students fill in the blanks with the correct answers. (Synopsis with key follows:)

Taking Responsibility Synopsis-KEY

Responsible - I choose my actions and statements and accept the consequences (both good and bad) for them.

1.Responsibility means that I am responsible for my actions and statements.

2.I am making a choice to do or say something.

3.Responsible statements start with I.

4.If I say or do something, I will accept the good or bad consequences.

Not Responsible - I put the blame on others for my actions or statements and say it is not fair for me to have to accept the bad consequences for my actions or statements.

1. Not responsible means that I am not responsible for my actions or

statements.

2. I am saying I have no choice. Other people run my life. I have no

control over myself.

3. Not responsible statements place blame by using words like YOU or it.

Which definition fits you? How can you be responsible for your statements or actions?

ACTIVITY 6 JOURNAL

Step 1: Handout worksheet titled EGO TRIP JOURNAL. Have students fill out the journal

NAME

DATE

DISCUSSION GUIDELINE

Behaviors that contribute to productive discussions:

1. expressed my ideas, opinions, views

2. stayed on the subject of the discussion

3. listened to what others were saying

4. allowing others to finish speaking without interrupting

5. had eye contact with person who was speaking

6. had eye contact with others while I was speaking

7. maintained attentive body posture:

leaned forward

visually followed flow of discussion

no-distracting gestures

8. other

I FEEL VERY GOOD ABOUT MY DISCUSSION BEHAVIOR TODAY.

YES NO

WHY?

ROLE PLAY 1: HOMEWORK NOT DONE

TEACHER: "WHY DON'T YOU HAVE YOUR HOMEWORK?"

Sl: "I LOST IT ON THE BUS."

S2: "MY BABY BROTHER THREW UP ON IT."

S3: "I FORGOT IT."

ROLE PLAY 2: TURNING IN HOMEWORK

TEACHER: "GET OUT YOUR HOMEWORK.'

Sl: "HERE IT IS."

S2: "SOMEONE AT WORK SPILLED STUFF ON IT."

S3: "I DON'T HAVE IT."

TEACHER DEMONSTRATION: RESPONSIBLE

AND NOT RESPONSIBLE STATEMENTS

(ANSWER SHEET)

DIRECTIONS: 1. WATCH EACH SCENE.

2. PUT "A" BESIDE THE NAME OF THE PERSON WHO IS MAKING RESPONSIBLE STATEMENTS.

1. JANET MARY

2. ANNE CLASS

3. TEACHER CLASS

TAKING RESPONSIBILITY (SYNOPSIS)

RESPONSIBLE - I CHOOSE MY ACTIONS AND STATEMENTS AND ACCEPT THE CONSEQUENCES

(BOTH GOOD AND BAD) FOR THEM.

1. RESPONSIBILITY MEANS THAT AM RESPONSIBLE FOR MY ACTION AND STATEMENTS.

2. I AM MAKING A TO DO OR SAY SOMETHING.

3. RESPONSIBLE STATEMENTS START WITH

4. IF I SAY OR DO SOMETHING, WILL ACCEPT THE GOOD OR BAD

CONSEQUENCES.

NOT RESPONSIBLE - I PUT THE BLAME ON OTHERS FOR MY ACTIONS OR STATEMENTS AND

SAY IT IS NOT FAIR FOR ME TO HAVE TO ACCEPT THE BAD CONSEQUENCES FOR MY ACTIONS OR STATEMENTS.

1. NOT RESPONSIBLE MEANS THAT AM NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR MY ACTIONS OR STATEMENTS.

2. I AM SAYING HAVE NO CHOICE. OTHER PEOPLE RUN MY LIFE. I

HAVE NO OVER MYSELF.

3. NOT RESPONSIBLE STATEMENTS PLACE BLAME BY USING WORDS

LIKE OR

WHICH DEFINITION FITS YOU? HOW CAN YOU BE RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR STATEMENTS OR

ACTIONS?

NAME

DATE

EGO-TRIP JOURNAL

I AM AN IMPORTANT PERSON BECAUSE

I AM A WORTHWHILE PERSON BECAUSE

I LIKE MYSELF AND I FEEL GOOD TODAY BECAUSE

TODAY I LEARNED

LESSON 4 Assuming Responsibility

Background: The teacher should be supportive of students' efforts to change statements. Be aware that students may feel uncomfortable when they are writing their own cop-out phrases. Many of them may not be aware of or want to admit that they use cop-out statements to be irresponsible. The teacher should reinforce all student attempts to be responsible. Simply label not responsible statements. Don't argue with any student about his statements. Arguing only makes the student more defensive.

Materials and Equipment:

1. Student Activity Sheets

a.Cop-out phrases

b.My three cop-out phrases

c.Responsibility Quick Check

d.Journal

Activities

1. Relaxation Exercises 5 minutes

2. Cop-out phrase 25 minutes

3. Responsibility Quick Check 10 minutes

4. Journal 5 minutes

ACTIVITY 1 Relaxation Exercises

Steps 1: Allow students to put their heads down and quietly relax for 5 minutes.

ACTIVITY 2 Cop-Out Phrases

Step 1: A. Tell students: "Most of us have, though we may not be aware of it, key phrases that we use to give responsibility to others; to blame others. These statements are called "cop-out" phrases. Some examples are: It is not my fault. It doesn't matter any way. Can any of you think of one? How can we tell if our statements are cop-out phrases?" (They are not responsible statements, start with you, it, etc., blame others).

B. Model for students the process of evaluating responsible and irresponsible statements. Use this process:

Use the statement: "You make me angry!"

1. "Is this a responsible statement?" (No)

2. "How do you know?" (Puts blame on you)

Change to: I choose to be angry at you. (I have a choice as to whether or not I will let your actions anger me. Thus, I am responsible for my being angry or not.)

Repeat the process using the following phrase: "It broke."

1. "Is this a responsible statement?" (No)

2. "How do you know?" (Puts blame on it)

(things don't break by themselves, there is no magic in "it". I can break things and I am choosing to be responsible for breaking something.) Change to: I broke it.

Step 2: Ask one or two students to go through the evaluation process with the following statements:

1. "You hurt my feelings!"

2. "It spilled."

Step 3: A. Handout sheet titled COP-OUT PHRASES.

B. Divide the students into three groups and have them change each phrase so that it comes from a responsible position. (Correct responses are):

Cop-out Phrases Responsible Statements

1. I can't do it. 1. I choose not to do it.

2. He made me do it. 2. I chose to do it.

3. It got lost. 3. I lost it. (there is no it to lose anything. Some person lost it.)

4. I'd die if it happened to me. 4. I would choose to be scared or embarrassed if I did that (but you won't actually die.)

5. It's not possible. 5. I don't choose to do it.

6. I can't get up on school mornings. 6. In the past, I haven't

chosen to get up on

school mornings or I choose not to get up in the mornings.

Step 4: After each group has finished all the phrases, ask one member of each group to read cop-outs while another member reads the responsible position statements.

Step 5: Have groups return to their class seats. Handout the sheet titled MY THREE COP OUT PHRASES. Ask each student to think of three cop-out phrases they have used recently. They can refer to the list in the previous activity if they need help. Tell students to write three of their cop-out phrases on their activity sheet. After each cop-out phrase the student should rewrite the phrase to come from a responsible position. Walk around and help students who may be having difficulty with this activity.

Example: (Write on board and read orally)

1. I can't take out the garbage. Responsible Statement: I don't want to take the garbage out now. Say: "Your body can, in fact, take out the garbage. What you are really saying is that you want to find out if you have a choice about taking out the garbage. Can you compromise on the time? What are the consequences if you don't take out the garbage at all."

After the students finish their three phrases, ask the students to volunteer to read one of their cop-out phrases and its responsible statement form.

ACTIVITY 3 Responsibility Quick Check

Step 1: Handout the sheet titled RESPONSIBILITY QUICK CHECK. Tell the students to put a check by the name of the person who is being responsible. (The statements can be read to the class as a whole or to individual students as necessary.)

RESPONSIBILITY QUICK CHECK

1. Susan: Gym makes me sick.

Mary: I choose to be sick in gym because I am not good in sports.

2. Anita: I will not do the homework tonight because we are going to Galveston.

Jim: I can't do my homework. I have to play baseball tonight.

3. Cory: My homework is lost.

Farrah: I lost my homework on the bus.

4. Beth: I'll just die if Paul doesn't ask me to the concert.

Tina: I will choose to be very hurt if Paul doesn't ask me to the concert.

5. Tom: Jack hit me first.

Frank: I hit Jack after he hit me.

Step 2: After each student has finished, give the answers to the class and let the students correct their own papers. Orally ask how did they do? Ask if they have any questions about any of the items. Give positive reinforcement for student participation.

ACTIVITY 4 Journal

Step 1: Handout worksheet titled EGO TRIP JOURNAL. Have students fill out the journal

COP-OUT PHRASES

Directions: A. Look at each cop-out statement. Ask yourself:

1. Is this a responsible statement?

2. Does it blame others or "it"?

B. Change each cop-out phrase into a responsible statement. Write the responsible statement in the Responsible Statement column.

changed

COP-OUT PHRASE RESPONSIBLE STATEMENT

1. I can't do it. 1.

2. He made me do it. 2.

3. It got lost. 3.

4. I'd die if it happened to me. 4.

5. It's not possible 5.

6. 1 can't get up on school mornings. 6.

MY THREE COP-OUT PHRASES

change

COP-OUT PHRASE RESPONSIBLE STATEMENT

1. 1.

2. 2.

3. 3.

RESPONSIBILITY QUICK CHECK

DIRECTIONS: A. Read each statement. Decide if the statement is responsible or not responsible (a cop-out phrase).

B. Put a by the responsible statement.

1. SUSAN: Gym makes me sick.

MARY: I choose to be sick in gym because I am not good in sports.

2. ANITA: I will not do the homework tonight because we are going to Galveston.

JIM: I can't do my homework. I have to play baseball tonight.

3. CORY: My homework is lost.

FARRAH: I lost my homework on the bus.

4. BETH: I'll just die if Paul doesn't ask me to the concert.

TINA: I will choose to be hurt if Paul doesn't ask me to the concert.

5. TOM: Jack hit me first.

FRANK: I hit Jack after he hit me.

NAME

DATE

EGO-TRIP JOURNAL

I AM AN IMPORTANT PERSON BECAUSE

I AM A WORTHWHILE PERSON BECAUSE

I LIKE MYSELF AND I FEEL GOOD TODAY BECAUSE

TODAY I LEARNED

LESSON 5 Dealing with Persons in Authority Positions

Background: The teacher should be aware that activities in this lesson can result not only in active discussion but also serve as an opportunity for students to "shoot down 11 the school situation. The discussion of persons in authority often brings out hostile and aggressive behaviors in students. The teacher should approach this lesson with the attitude that authority-controlled situations such as school rules) laws and parent rules will continue to exist and are needed for constructive,reasons (to protect us , to reach constructive goals, etc.). They need not be viewed with hostile or aggressive feelings because these rules and situations may prevent others from hating us and our things. This approach should be stated during the discussion in an open manner as the teacher's opinion. (Be careful not to sound too authoritarian). State that the purpose of the activities is to see what the students can do about their feelings toward authoritarian situations, maintaining as much of their self-control and self responsibility as possible.

Materials and Equipment:

1. Student Activity Sheets

a.Persons in Authority Positions - Comic Strips

b.Journal

2. Handouts

a.Discussion Guidelines

3. Timer

Activities: 1. Relaxation Exercises 5 minutes

2. Red Light-Green Light Game 10 minutes

3. Brainstorm Controlled Situation 5 minutes

4. Persons in Authority Positions: Comic Strips 20 minutes

5. Journal 5 minutes

ACTIVITY 1 Relaxation Exercises

Step 1: Allow students to put their heads down and quietly relax for 5 minutes.

ACTIVITY 2 Red Light-Green Light

Step 1: Tell students that they are going to play a game in which they are told what to do b you.

Make these points:

1. This game is to show students what it is like to have limited

control over their actions.

2. Tell students to be aware of how they are feeling during the game.

3. Tell them that they will have an opportunity to discuss how they feel after the game.

Step 2: Tell all the students to stand at one end of the classroom. Use a chair as a starting place. Tell the students that we are going to play red light-green light. The teacher will call out "green light", enabling the students to rave; and "red light", forcing the student to stop. If someone is moving after the teacher says red light, he must return to the starting line. The object of the game is to reach the teacher (who is standing at the other end of the room) first. Make this as frustrating as possible. Do not let anyone get to the "win" chair. Send a lot of students back. Set a timer for five minutes.

Step 3: After five minutes ask students to return to their seats and hand out discussion guidelines.

Step 4: Discussion

1. "What did you feel in this game?" "Why?" (anger, frustration,

disappointment, helpless). Write down on the board what the students

say they felt.

2. "Did you like it?"

3. "How does it feel to do just as you are told all the time?"

ACTIVITY 3 Brainstorm: Controlled Situations

Step 1: Point to the feelings the student listed in the previous activity and ask:

1. "What situations in your life are like "red light-green light" Where

persons in authority are in control to some extent?" (Try to elicit school situations, parents, etc.)

2. "Do you feel some of the same emotions you felt during the game?"

3. "Can you stop these "persons in authority" from controlling parts of your life." (the realistic answer is "no" because even if students say "yes) - that they could challenge the authority - they would suffer the con